I think I'm going to drop German.. Don't think I can cope with 6 modules.. Initially I thought I could but after my average results came out, I think I should work harder to maintain or improve my score.

Feels kinda bittersweet. Always imagined myself being able to pick up a new language and achieving greater heights. One of the things in my bucket lists has always been to be a polyglot (many years and zero new languages later *guffaws*), but clearly I don't think I'm that apt at it.

Maybe some day I'll go back and continue what I started.


A little Grey's in anticipation of 2014:

Change… We don’t like it, we fear it. But we can’t stop it from coming. We either adapt to change, or we get left behind. It hurts to grow. Anybody who tells you it doesn’t, is lying. But here’s the truth: Sometimes, the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes, change is good. Sometimes, change is… everything.

Speaking of change, I want to change my blogskin so much but I don't know how to anymore...

As 2013 draws to a close, I'm a little overwhelmed by the things I'm dealing with rn.

I'm contemplating so many things and I think I solved quite a few things just in a day so I feel like I need to let everything get out of my head! Cos the people I would talk to are pretty busy/overseas/out of reach. There's like the course transfer stuff, heartland tour stuff, and work.

Finally decided on my move to Env studies from FASS. Gosh it's really like a struggle for me to decide. But in the end, (I didn't weigh all my choices before I clicked 'confirm' on the portal, so I shall now) I guess if I was so discontented with my first sem in FASS, I should really make a change and stick to it - for good.

For BES:
It's a privilege to be studying from so many facs
It will be 3.5 years of a challenge, having to speak up during group work, a much more hectic uni life (field trips, many group works) compared to my first sem, but if I can find a balance - and i'm determined to do so, it will be immensely rewarding.
Knowing more people and making new friends, finding somewhere I belong to (this I've been struggling in my uni life)
I won't have to keep on feeling sorry that I'm not doing science-related stuff, cos I think the vibe I've been giving people recently is that I'm rather depressed and moody HA
Finding a purpose in life - not being so uncertain of the future

Against BES (i.e. staying in FASS):
I have to give up my original plan of going to Germany for SEP (I've already set that aside and let the idea sink already so it's not so much of a concern - i.e. I'm dropping LPP - the immersion prog, the exchange prog and stuff)
I might have to face getting poor results because of the pretty hectic schedule and having to compete with people who're majoring in the elective mods (eg chem, bio, math etc)
I have to answer to people who know I'm in fass why I chose to change my course, maybe even get branded a traitor by some

Well, screw it, I'm prepared for whatever I have to face. If I have the right attitude, the right mindset, I believe I can achieve it and not let down the people who really care for me and are willing to comfort me.

I saw my schedule for next sem. It's mad. But bring it on, life!!! I'm ready to put 2013 behind me and fight for what I want to accomplish!

I realise I'm not doing much here at my dad's office so I'm currently foodblog-hopping!

Some nice blogs I can't stop reading:

The Kitchn | Inspiring cooks, nourishing homes
Really love the layout and display of the blog, and the numerous entries the writers are committed to. I mostly check out the easy recipes for one though. :)

Eat Like a Girl | A London Food Blog & Travel Blog – Always Cooking, Eating & on the Move
I believe she's a travel blogger, with pretty nice blogs about food around the world!

Not Without Salt - “Where would we be without salt?” - James Beard
Super pretty layout, even though I'm not so much into the recipes. But I really love the posts titled "Dating my Husband". Really sweet, and I hope I can date my husband when I'm married next time!

Thoughts By Natalie
A blog I used to spend much time reading. Love her extensive pinterest walls and the take on various stuff like beauty, food, style etc!


I feel kinda useless helping out at my dad's office cos I'm pretty much not helping much anywhere.. So rn I'm merely using my presence to make up for my uselessness. HAHA.

Oh how I wished I could make a living being a foodblogger. Sounds like a nice way to live. And also, since I'm kinda starting my new life (without yx), I would really really love to live in Europe one day! Yeah it was strange how we disliked spending time away from each other and after a period of absence we would feel kinda distant. Guess that's probably a sign that we weren't meant for each other.

These days, it really feels funny, how suddenly the objects we shared during our relationship seemed so irrelevant. I see the jar of hearts he folded me back then for my bday, and the couple rings we bought but I so seldom wore out, and the many polaroid films I bought cos I wanted to spam with him. And the other day I realised my wallet photo was still the polaroid of us. Ah well. Strange how I don't feel that bad. He often lingers in my thoughts, but I just don't feel that melancholic. Guess it's a new phase of my life and I'm glad to embrace it:)

What a day!

Gonna blog about my wisdom teeth extraction at the NDC (if you're terrified about stuff like that don't read!!! but yeah, you wanna find out how strange and awkward medical procedures are then read. ha.)

Had a wisdom teeth extraction today, all 4 + 1 supernumerary teeth (extra teeth). Boy was it an experience! My first time going under GA and it's a really quick procedure I think, less than an hour. Of course recovery time and stuff took a while, but I must say the staff at the National Dental Centre are really professional! And their service is superb!!

So when I went, I was like 25min early from the time they told me to report, but I still had to wait and stuff... I had to change into this awkwardly huge surgery gown and wait. and wait. and wait. Think I waited for like 2 hours before it was my turn and there were some other kids before me (they schedule the order by age).

Right, so it was finally my turn. I was asked to walk into the surgery room, and there were quite a number of people preparing stuff. I had to sit on the bed/table, then the nurses started to strap my legs and one hand to prevent movement I guess. Then this nurse made me breathe through an oxygen mask (she said it was "oxygen") HAHAHA *suspicious* and then another person, whom i couldnt tell was a surgeon or nurse, I presume the anesthesia person, poked this needle into my wrist. Damn that hurt a little, actually it didn't really hurt it was more like an annoying dull pain. I was totally thinking they didn't warn me about that (first person I thought of was Eurona and her intense phobia of needles), I suppose it's cos they wanna catch people like her off guard and I think most people won't react as negatively as her.. Yea, I believe the anesthesia came from the needle, and a while later I was drifting off already.

And so, the surgery was over, and after a while I was on my bed waiting to come around. I must say, what a straaaaaaange feeling that was, it's like you knew you were awake and you could open your eyes or move your hands/legs but you just didn't want to and all you wanted to do was close your eyes and drift off hopefully. That, sadly, never happened and I rmb I was wide awake but my body just refused to open my eyes for more than 0.5s.. And I stayed pretty much awake the whole time. And then I was like in a this hyper-conscious state while waiting to wake up, first I felt the cold, then my stomach decided to have a terrible stomachache, and worse, I couldn't do anything about it cos I was mega groggy.
after which I was kinda hit by the realisation that there was a HUGE lump of phlegm lurking in my throat. But I couldn't cough, cos there were two gauges sticking out from my mouth, collecting saliva... Yeah and the whole time I was wondering if I was drooling or dribbling out of my mouth.. Hopefully not meh.

The really friendly and experienced senior nurse then pushed me out of the surgery room, cos she said it's warmer there. Yeah, thankfully. She told me she'll contact my mom and then told me my teeth were by the table at the side. The minute I could safely move my arms around I figured I'll just grab my teeth to check it our and see if I could reach my phone in my bag. I think the nurse heard my trying to open the pedestal so she came over to help me get my stuff. The service is really superb!

Day 2
okay so here I am, I wanted to post this yesterday but was in a hurry to go home so I didnt. Anyway, it's a lot better today, without all the blood and muck in my mouth. Nonetheless, I still can't quite speak or open my mouth cos after a whole night of clenching my mouth shut during sleeping (it just happens idk why), it's a lot harder to open my mouth now. and the numbness is kinda gone so I can actually feel pain when I touch my skin at where the extraction was.

And NDC just gave me a call a while ago to ask how I was feeling and some instructions on keeping it clean. This only reinforces how great their service is!

Hope I can start taking solid foods soon! All I wanna eat now is ice cream actually though. Craving Daily scoop's avocado :)

What an eventful day!

From getting a new relationship status early in the morning to spending quality time with my best friends, this really kinda sums up 2013 for me.

I found out who my true friends are, who I will stay together and maintain relations with for a really long time down the road. Sadly I haven't exactly found such friends in uni due to my passiveness in joining activities (this needs to change next year). Things come and go, and I guess I really  need to confront a rather big fear of mine: change. I dislike and detest change, maybe that's why I seem to love the idea of old, nostalgia, classic as opposed to new. I believe this is an Achilles' heel for me, and it appears that it has come back to haunt me. Oh well, my friends have moved on, so I guess it's time for me to find a new chapter in my life!

I know I should really be letting this go, but I can't bear to let it go away without a decent blog post..

Sometimes it's really sucks that someone you used to be so close with drifts apart and you find that you have fewer and fewer words to say to each other. What's even more hurtful is that he decides to become a stranger in a matter of weeks. He just seemed so dreary every time he saw me these past few weeks. Maybe it's still puppy love from his perspective, something that dies down after the chase. Oh well. It's unfair to make assumptions about his perspective, so I should stop. I already miss the routines. Knowing that there won't be a morning whatsapp on my phone every morning when I wake up, that there won't be a partner who'll check out the latest movies and eat good food with me, that there won't be someone to hold my hands when they turn icy cold like they always do, that I won't ever be shopping for clothes so that I can wear them out brand new on saturdays with you. It's time to move on and find new routines. Time to get stop living in the past.

What I'm really afraid of is when people ask about it. Maybe I was dumb to be so hopeful and announce it to the whole world - my og, my close friends, my not so close friends. After my past experiences I thought that keeping a relationship in the dark from the whole world would definitely not work for me. I was always envious of couples that could click so well in other people's presence, and you could just see them glow together. But maybe this overly hopeful me was what killed it. I should have known this was coming. It already sucked during the past few weeks when people mentioned him and asked what he was doing, and whether I was spending time or celebrating my birthday with him. More of it to come, I believe.

Ah well. See how it goes.

Nonetheless, I must say it feels strange as well because I ended up finding myself very very happy to be in the presence of my two dearest friends. It's almost as though nothing happened this morning. They're always there to comfort me, to listen to me rant, and we never have a dull moment together. Really thankful for what I have.

What a convenient way to end things.

What's the point of knowing?

Non-fiction books. Yeah they're really interesting sometimes. The way the author pushes to have his voice heard through his book and to make his thoughts known to his readers. I mean, it's interesting, but so what? What's the point of knowing one POV?

My global studies lecturer often provides readings of different perspectives (yah I know how boring this is, perspectives are really important) so that we can see both sides of the picture. Sometimes people scream and criticise how horrible something is, and then we have the other person who claims that the same thing is actually really good if you look at it that way. So what do we students always do? Choose a side and then sit on the fence. So in the end, all you need is balance because that's what the world really needs, it needs balance. Cliche as it may sound, that's probably how most of my GP essays ended in jc. And probably how my FASS essays will end in the future..

Which makes me question, so what if we know?

Man, I should really have just gone to science. At least for science, knowing really empowers you (scientists) and helps you make vast improvements to a system. For humanities, it just seems all too complex and overwhelming for you to do anything really helpful.

Speaking of which, I really miss those days in JC when I knew about a topic so well, and I knew how applicable it was to our world. For example, I knew precisely what happens in our cells that causes cancer and cool stuff like that, but I know soon all this info will drift away from my head slowly. My parents used to ask me questions to clarify stuff they see on the news or tv if they want the specific details especially when it concerns biology or chemistry, and I would be able to really describe in a very detailed way. In the near future I can totally see myself as those people who watch documentaries or explanatory videos on YouTube to know more about something. Sigh, pie. URGGG okay as I'm typing this I really can't stand how I'm so greedy and want to know everything there is to know in the worldddddd. Eesh. It's not like I can split myself into two and get a science major or smth rightttt.

:) I'm a happy kid now I guess. Really thankful to have my friends and family who wished me a good birthday in the midst of exams. (Even though I didn't really study much since most of my papers were over..)

Ah well. And I'm really in love with this blogshop model girl called Elaine Jasmine! She's so pretty and she lost so much weight in a matter of months. Motivation for me:) I shall really start exercising. Shall go for a run in the evening!

I think I'm going to drop German.. Don't think I can cope with 6 modules.. Initially I thought I could but after my average results came out, I think I should work harder to maintain or improve my score.

Feels kinda bittersweet. Always imagined myself being able to pick up a new language and achieving greater heights. One of the things in my bucket lists has always been to be a polyglot (many years and zero new languages later *guffaws*), but clearly I don't think I'm that apt at it.

Maybe some day I'll go back and continue what I started.


A little Grey's in anticipation of 2014:

Change… We don’t like it, we fear it. But we can’t stop it from coming. We either adapt to change, or we get left behind. It hurts to grow. Anybody who tells you it doesn’t, is lying. But here’s the truth: Sometimes, the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes, change is good. Sometimes, change is… everything.

Speaking of change, I want to change my blogskin so much but I don't know how to anymore...

As 2013 draws to a close, I'm a little overwhelmed by the things I'm dealing with rn.

I'm contemplating so many things and I think I solved quite a few things just in a day so I feel like I need to let everything get out of my head! Cos the people I would talk to are pretty busy/overseas/out of reach. There's like the course transfer stuff, heartland tour stuff, and work.

Finally decided on my move to Env studies from FASS. Gosh it's really like a struggle for me to decide. But in the end, (I didn't weigh all my choices before I clicked 'confirm' on the portal, so I shall now) I guess if I was so discontented with my first sem in FASS, I should really make a change and stick to it - for good.

For BES:
It's a privilege to be studying from so many facs
It will be 3.5 years of a challenge, having to speak up during group work, a much more hectic uni life (field trips, many group works) compared to my first sem, but if I can find a balance - and i'm determined to do so, it will be immensely rewarding.
Knowing more people and making new friends, finding somewhere I belong to (this I've been struggling in my uni life)
I won't have to keep on feeling sorry that I'm not doing science-related stuff, cos I think the vibe I've been giving people recently is that I'm rather depressed and moody HA
Finding a purpose in life - not being so uncertain of the future

Against BES (i.e. staying in FASS):
I have to give up my original plan of going to Germany for SEP (I've already set that aside and let the idea sink already so it's not so much of a concern - i.e. I'm dropping LPP - the immersion prog, the exchange prog and stuff)
I might have to face getting poor results because of the pretty hectic schedule and having to compete with people who're majoring in the elective mods (eg chem, bio, math etc)
I have to answer to people who know I'm in fass why I chose to change my course, maybe even get branded a traitor by some

Well, screw it, I'm prepared for whatever I have to face. If I have the right attitude, the right mindset, I believe I can achieve it and not let down the people who really care for me and are willing to comfort me.

I saw my schedule for next sem. It's mad. But bring it on, life!!! I'm ready to put 2013 behind me and fight for what I want to accomplish!

I realise I'm not doing much here at my dad's office so I'm currently foodblog-hopping!

Some nice blogs I can't stop reading:

The Kitchn | Inspiring cooks, nourishing homes
Really love the layout and display of the blog, and the numerous entries the writers are committed to. I mostly check out the easy recipes for one though. :)

Eat Like a Girl | A London Food Blog & Travel Blog – Always Cooking, Eating & on the Move
I believe she's a travel blogger, with pretty nice blogs about food around the world!

Not Without Salt - “Where would we be without salt?” - James Beard
Super pretty layout, even though I'm not so much into the recipes. But I really love the posts titled "Dating my Husband". Really sweet, and I hope I can date my husband when I'm married next time!

Thoughts By Natalie
A blog I used to spend much time reading. Love her extensive pinterest walls and the take on various stuff like beauty, food, style etc!


I feel kinda useless helping out at my dad's office cos I'm pretty much not helping much anywhere.. So rn I'm merely using my presence to make up for my uselessness. HAHA.

Oh how I wished I could make a living being a foodblogger. Sounds like a nice way to live. And also, since I'm kinda starting my new life (without yx), I would really really love to live in Europe one day! Yeah it was strange how we disliked spending time away from each other and after a period of absence we would feel kinda distant. Guess that's probably a sign that we weren't meant for each other.

These days, it really feels funny, how suddenly the objects we shared during our relationship seemed so irrelevant. I see the jar of hearts he folded me back then for my bday, and the couple rings we bought but I so seldom wore out, and the many polaroid films I bought cos I wanted to spam with him. And the other day I realised my wallet photo was still the polaroid of us. Ah well. Strange how I don't feel that bad. He often lingers in my thoughts, but I just don't feel that melancholic. Guess it's a new phase of my life and I'm glad to embrace it:)

What a day!

Gonna blog about my wisdom teeth extraction at the NDC (if you're terrified about stuff like that don't read!!! but yeah, you wanna find out how strange and awkward medical procedures are then read. ha.)

Had a wisdom teeth extraction today, all 4 + 1 supernumerary teeth (extra teeth). Boy was it an experience! My first time going under GA and it's a really quick procedure I think, less than an hour. Of course recovery time and stuff took a while, but I must say the staff at the National Dental Centre are really professional! And their service is superb!!

So when I went, I was like 25min early from the time they told me to report, but I still had to wait and stuff... I had to change into this awkwardly huge surgery gown and wait. and wait. and wait. Think I waited for like 2 hours before it was my turn and there were some other kids before me (they schedule the order by age).

Right, so it was finally my turn. I was asked to walk into the surgery room, and there were quite a number of people preparing stuff. I had to sit on the bed/table, then the nurses started to strap my legs and one hand to prevent movement I guess. Then this nurse made me breathe through an oxygen mask (she said it was "oxygen") HAHAHA *suspicious* and then another person, whom i couldnt tell was a surgeon or nurse, I presume the anesthesia person, poked this needle into my wrist. Damn that hurt a little, actually it didn't really hurt it was more like an annoying dull pain. I was totally thinking they didn't warn me about that (first person I thought of was Eurona and her intense phobia of needles), I suppose it's cos they wanna catch people like her off guard and I think most people won't react as negatively as her.. Yea, I believe the anesthesia came from the needle, and a while later I was drifting off already.

And so, the surgery was over, and after a while I was on my bed waiting to come around. I must say, what a straaaaaaange feeling that was, it's like you knew you were awake and you could open your eyes or move your hands/legs but you just didn't want to and all you wanted to do was close your eyes and drift off hopefully. That, sadly, never happened and I rmb I was wide awake but my body just refused to open my eyes for more than 0.5s.. And I stayed pretty much awake the whole time. And then I was like in a this hyper-conscious state while waiting to wake up, first I felt the cold, then my stomach decided to have a terrible stomachache, and worse, I couldn't do anything about it cos I was mega groggy.
after which I was kinda hit by the realisation that there was a HUGE lump of phlegm lurking in my throat. But I couldn't cough, cos there were two gauges sticking out from my mouth, collecting saliva... Yeah and the whole time I was wondering if I was drooling or dribbling out of my mouth.. Hopefully not meh.

The really friendly and experienced senior nurse then pushed me out of the surgery room, cos she said it's warmer there. Yeah, thankfully. She told me she'll contact my mom and then told me my teeth were by the table at the side. The minute I could safely move my arms around I figured I'll just grab my teeth to check it our and see if I could reach my phone in my bag. I think the nurse heard my trying to open the pedestal so she came over to help me get my stuff. The service is really superb!

Day 2
okay so here I am, I wanted to post this yesterday but was in a hurry to go home so I didnt. Anyway, it's a lot better today, without all the blood and muck in my mouth. Nonetheless, I still can't quite speak or open my mouth cos after a whole night of clenching my mouth shut during sleeping (it just happens idk why), it's a lot harder to open my mouth now. and the numbness is kinda gone so I can actually feel pain when I touch my skin at where the extraction was.

And NDC just gave me a call a while ago to ask how I was feeling and some instructions on keeping it clean. This only reinforces how great their service is!

Hope I can start taking solid foods soon! All I wanna eat now is ice cream actually though. Craving Daily scoop's avocado :)

What an eventful day!

From getting a new relationship status early in the morning to spending quality time with my best friends, this really kinda sums up 2013 for me.

I found out who my true friends are, who I will stay together and maintain relations with for a really long time down the road. Sadly I haven't exactly found such friends in uni due to my passiveness in joining activities (this needs to change next year). Things come and go, and I guess I really  need to confront a rather big fear of mine: change. I dislike and detest change, maybe that's why I seem to love the idea of old, nostalgia, classic as opposed to new. I believe this is an Achilles' heel for me, and it appears that it has come back to haunt me. Oh well, my friends have moved on, so I guess it's time for me to find a new chapter in my life!

I know I should really be letting this go, but I can't bear to let it go away without a decent blog post..

Sometimes it's really sucks that someone you used to be so close with drifts apart and you find that you have fewer and fewer words to say to each other. What's even more hurtful is that he decides to become a stranger in a matter of weeks. He just seemed so dreary every time he saw me these past few weeks. Maybe it's still puppy love from his perspective, something that dies down after the chase. Oh well. It's unfair to make assumptions about his perspective, so I should stop. I already miss the routines. Knowing that there won't be a morning whatsapp on my phone every morning when I wake up, that there won't be a partner who'll check out the latest movies and eat good food with me, that there won't be someone to hold my hands when they turn icy cold like they always do, that I won't ever be shopping for clothes so that I can wear them out brand new on saturdays with you. It's time to move on and find new routines. Time to get stop living in the past.

What I'm really afraid of is when people ask about it. Maybe I was dumb to be so hopeful and announce it to the whole world - my og, my close friends, my not so close friends. After my past experiences I thought that keeping a relationship in the dark from the whole world would definitely not work for me. I was always envious of couples that could click so well in other people's presence, and you could just see them glow together. But maybe this overly hopeful me was what killed it. I should have known this was coming. It already sucked during the past few weeks when people mentioned him and asked what he was doing, and whether I was spending time or celebrating my birthday with him. More of it to come, I believe.

Ah well. See how it goes.

Nonetheless, I must say it feels strange as well because I ended up finding myself very very happy to be in the presence of my two dearest friends. It's almost as though nothing happened this morning. They're always there to comfort me, to listen to me rant, and we never have a dull moment together. Really thankful for what I have.

What a convenient way to end things.

What's the point of knowing?

Non-fiction books. Yeah they're really interesting sometimes. The way the author pushes to have his voice heard through his book and to make his thoughts known to his readers. I mean, it's interesting, but so what? What's the point of knowing one POV?

My global studies lecturer often provides readings of different perspectives (yah I know how boring this is, perspectives are really important) so that we can see both sides of the picture. Sometimes people scream and criticise how horrible something is, and then we have the other person who claims that the same thing is actually really good if you look at it that way. So what do we students always do? Choose a side and then sit on the fence. So in the end, all you need is balance because that's what the world really needs, it needs balance. Cliche as it may sound, that's probably how most of my GP essays ended in jc. And probably how my FASS essays will end in the future..

Which makes me question, so what if we know?

Man, I should really have just gone to science. At least for science, knowing really empowers you (scientists) and helps you make vast improvements to a system. For humanities, it just seems all too complex and overwhelming for you to do anything really helpful.

Speaking of which, I really miss those days in JC when I knew about a topic so well, and I knew how applicable it was to our world. For example, I knew precisely what happens in our cells that causes cancer and cool stuff like that, but I know soon all this info will drift away from my head slowly. My parents used to ask me questions to clarify stuff they see on the news or tv if they want the specific details especially when it concerns biology or chemistry, and I would be able to really describe in a very detailed way. In the near future I can totally see myself as those people who watch documentaries or explanatory videos on YouTube to know more about something. Sigh, pie. URGGG okay as I'm typing this I really can't stand how I'm so greedy and want to know everything there is to know in the worldddddd. Eesh. It's not like I can split myself into two and get a science major or smth rightttt.

:) I'm a happy kid now I guess. Really thankful to have my friends and family who wished me a good birthday in the midst of exams. (Even though I didn't really study much since most of my papers were over..)

Ah well. And I'm really in love with this blogshop model girl called Elaine Jasmine! She's so pretty and she lost so much weight in a matter of months. Motivation for me:) I shall really start exercising. Shall go for a run in the evening!